Show your wine-related punmanship, win some arty wine
Some wine is good. Some art is also good. So why not combine forces for a new wine, thought a wine company and an artist. The result was the seemingly socialist booze that goes by the name of The People’s Wine. And we’ve got heaps of it, in two different colours, to give away.
You can read all about The People’s Wine and how the whole shebang with Constellation and Martin Poppelwell came about here. But you don’t care about that, do you? You just want some free stuff. Fair enough, but, as per usual, we require some input from our educated and talented readers before we’ll dish that free stuff out.
StopPress is diversifying and launching our own brand of wine, simply because there just isn’t enough of it out there at the moment. So, furnish us with a ridiculous name for our new brand of wine (or send us a ridiculous one that already exists) and we’ll send the best five efforts a case of six bottles from The People’s Wine range. Extra points given for terrible puns. And here’s a few to get the creative juices fermenting.
thetablenz
August 31, 2010
Desperation Point Pinot Noir.
Mt Glut Savuignon Blanc
thetablenz
August 31, 2010
Marketer's Despair Shiraz
SFO Chardonnay
thetablenz
August 31, 2010
The Liquidator's Dog Chardonnay
Hubbard's Hubris Pinot Gris
Bev
August 31, 2010
Smouldering stump syrah
ng
August 31, 2010
wine about it 2010
Tony R
August 31, 2010
Wind up
The Leaky Building
The Big Squeeze
Top Pressed
Press Off
Graham
August 31, 2010
Rotting Turd
(Aroma will make your eyes water)
Mark Evans
August 31, 2010
So simple really … "Stop Pressed"
WolfgangK
August 31, 2010
Wine Not
Kane
August 31, 2010
Cheeky Bucket
Pig Slop
Fire at Will
Kiwigixxer
August 31, 2010
Mag Numb
J
August 31, 2010
"Don't think of Marker Pens"
"Don't think of Mothballs"
Kane
August 31, 2010
Flashed Rop
Legot P'Noir
Kane
August 31, 2010
I have a cider idea if that helps
Dicken's Cider
or
Slipperton's Cider
Kane
August 31, 2010
Twodollahooker
WolfgangK
August 31, 2010
Yield – or else
…
Up yours
…
Fragrant bush
…
thetablenz
August 31, 2010
The Whistling Adulterer
Shiraz
WolfgangK
August 31, 2010
Nice one Kane
I think I've sampled the latter. Not very pleasant. Awful nose and worse aftertaste. Over-aged as well I'm afraid. Quite bitter too if you don't cough up the 2 bucks
thetablenz
August 31, 2010
Bishop's Secret
Pinot Noir
WolfgangK
August 31, 2010
Pith take
WolfgangK
August 31, 2010
Over and barrell
…
Over the top
…
Shimply red
…
WolfgangK
August 31, 2010
sorry..Over a barrell
Kane
August 31, 2010
@WolfgangK. We must have had the same batch. I shared it with a few friends, which was a mistake to say the least.
WolfgangK
August 31, 2010
les odeurs aiment des chats
…
Miiaow
WolfgangK
August 31, 2010
i-Quaff
thetablenz
August 31, 2010
The Embalmer's Reserve
Riesling – Early Harvest
Mary
August 31, 2010
Stop. Press. Drink.
Piss du Marketing
Chug a jug
The Table Wine to Drink Down Under
thetablenz
August 31, 2010
This wine label creating's a lark, really, innit?
nodavebarry
August 31, 2010
1) Tui's Plonk. Yeah right.
2) Wanker plonk.
3) Yes we can!
Obama Wine for the People.
4) Ed's Ashes
5) Good kiwi whine
thetablenz
August 31, 2010
Key's Conceit
Viognier
thetablenz
August 31, 2010
Bollockburn Ridge
Rose
bob
September 1, 2010
Matthews Ridge
Glen
September 1, 2010
1.Pat's Kiss Chardonnay
2.Wrong Un Riesling
3.Attempted Suicide Port
4.Noble Rot
5.Toe Jam Merlot
6.Unexpected Hangover
7.Drink with/like a Fish Pinot Gris
8.It's Cheap Shite
9.Overburdened with Guilt
10.The Wrathful Vine
Baz
September 1, 2010
Moist Front
Mutton Gully
Fair Suckatha Sauvignon
thetablenz
September 1, 2010
Pleurisy Gravels
Sauvignon
thetablenz
September 1, 2010
Hubbard's Gulf
Sauvignon Blanc-like
thetablenz
September 1, 2010
Hotchin's Honour
cabernet/merlot/shiraz/kero
Mary
September 1, 2010
Piss take
Pinot oui
Vin du Piss
thetablenz
September 2, 2010
Kiddyfiddlers Cove
Botrytis Reisling
Weasel
September 3, 2010
Vin Cent
Not a cheap wine, but one that paints your palette blue and grey…….
I could have told you
Vin Cent
this world was never
meant for one
as beautiful as you.
Lynam
September 3, 2010
Noble T(rot)sky
State-run Shiraz
The People's Party Pinot (for people at parties)
Scott Kennedy
September 3, 2010
No legs,no depth,I smell old tires.Should we be encouraging
truckers to drink this plonk and drive ??? Who came up with this idea !!!
thetablenz
September 6, 2010
Shaky Isles
Chardonanny
Maria
September 6, 2010
1. Le Vin de Merde, or Wine of Shite as they say in Ireland.
2. K Syrah
3. USB (port) Wine
4. La De Da
Mereana
September 7, 2010
Jesus Juice
I actually stole this from Michael Jackson.. but still a very inappropriate name for a wine!!
Lisa
September 7, 2010
Marketing 101
*********
The Kicker
*********
Off The Record
*********
Recession Whines (2009 Vintage)
P2D2
September 7, 2010
Que Sera Syrah
More Than A Riesling(Boston…)
P2D2
September 7, 2010
Stop.Press.Ferment.Pour
Out Standing In Our Field
P2D2
September 7, 2010
Le Krunk Jooz (exotic etc)
Pinot Man (that billy joel song..)
Bonjour Rouge Pocelain – Pinot Noir
Pig Swill Fly
KieranC
September 7, 2010
"Mt. Porcelain"
"Le Rouge Yak" (and have a pic of a red yak under it)
dkd
September 7, 2010
Rise to Riesling
pinotplonk
Lisa
September 7, 2010
Above The Vine
Lisa
September 7, 2010
Red Hunter
Lisa
September 7, 2010
Vin-Vin
Doggone
September 8, 2010
Loose lips Chardonnay (after a few you know where the gossip ends up – yes, im looking at you stop press)
From the horses mouth – Pinot Noir way I said that – did I? hic
The shady deal – Sav Blanc
The gossip monger – unknown grape, grower or vinyard but it sure tastes good!
Stick it in yer gob – Rei sling that you cheeky bugger
Up yours – In your Rose-eh mate
RDT (not RTD! but I am!)
September 8, 2010
What a great idea for a comp!
Obviously Nubmer 1 should be
1. Wine Flu!
2. Drown my sorrows
3. The cure to a 60+ hour week
4. GenYine
5. Blotto
6. Gossip Girls Gwertz
7. Make my cheeks blush Rose
8.Red cheeked
9. Wined down after a hard day (comes in a BIIGG bottle)
10. Effervescent bubbly
RDT (not RTD!!)
September 8, 2010
11. Easy access!
Zoe Sizemore
September 9, 2010
Spring Clean On The Old Grey Matter
Zoe Sizemore
September 9, 2010
Liquid Afterthought
Tracy
September 10, 2010
Grapeful Dead
Purple Toe Jam
Markus Lush
How Ya Garn'
Arse over Kite
Graham
September 10, 2010
Bugger Me
Chas
September 10, 2010
SCF Range:
- Timaru Bitter
- South Canterbury Swine
Chch Quake range:
- Afters Hock
- Sewage Down – Pinot
(disclaimer – I'm from Chch. Not wishing to make light of people's woes!)
Angie F.
September 10, 2010
Shtopp Presshh… *hic!*
Chris Morgan
September 11, 2010
Pienot Griz.
This is a blokes drink and not to be confused with the sheilas drop , Pee no Glee. They drink their Pee No at lunch time with fatuos fare like feta fritata. You drink Griz with offal pie and chips from the local greasy spoon. The acid and alcohol levels in this boy have been constructed to deal with most blokes fare. Indigestion, nah, Reflux, nah Farting, yep: with a piquant bouquet of varietal expression embracing sulphur, week old undies and the bacon you had for breakfast today that should have been thrown out last week. Don't give it to the sheila; there are too many of them like us already.
Michael
September 13, 2010
1) Tiger's Choice
2) STOP. HAMMERED TIME.
3) Rene Pogel (I won't explain – but blokes of a certain age may get it…..)
4) Veritas
Marg
September 14, 2010
- Shirkers Shiraz: the off spring of two obscure grapes and of no use to anyone
- Self Serving Sav: Will blend with anything. Common and often overated.
- not a PETIT MESLIER: sparkling wine. (just fool them with labelling and wannabe wine collectors will back their Bentleys up to your back door.
- WTF Wines: aah who cares…let's get drunk!
Ben Fahy
September 21, 2010
It was a close run thing. But the winners were Bishop's Secret Pinot Noir, Matthew's Ridge, Le Rouge Yak, Up Yours and, slightly controversially, given it's not a wine, Slipperton's Cider.